SQUAT-SOLVING: DOES YOUR BUM HAVE A PhD?
The 2026 Neuro-Focused Glute Revolution is here. Stop lifting. Start thinking.
The Rise of the Academic Asset
The fitness industry has officially run out of ways to make us squat, so they’ve decided to complicate the process with “cognitive load.” We’re building bums that can not only destroy denim but also pass the Turing test.
- Neuro-Muscular Synergy: Solve differential equations while hip thrusting.
- The Rubik’s Protocol: Recite Pi backwards at the peak of contraction.
- Differential Gains: If your brain isn’t sweating, are you even training?
Don’t Overthink the Glute
At TopBum.com, we keep the humor high and the glutes higher. Put down the puzzle and pick up the weight.